The Missadventures of The Hero - “Busting Balls Wears Me Out.”

“Get ahold of her!” An assassin shouted, clothed in layered black robes.

Hope stepped forward and shot her boot directly into his balls, shooting him up in the air. His stupid eyes crossed as he squealed, tears already started spilling down his cheeks. Hope smirked. Another crybaby.

It was ten that ambushed her tonight. She had already crushed half of their balls, and this big bad assassin made six busted nuts.

The remaining men roared chasing after her, she darted forward, leaping and grasping a nearby tree-branch. She vaulted herself forward, and at the peak of her swing twisted around so on the backswing she would be sailing towards them. She picked her feet up, swinging both of them straight into one of the approaching assassins. Her boots crunched his balls, his feet left the ground and he cried out as he flew into the air.

“Busted,” Hope smirked, landing in her feet, her would-be assessing landed on his side, in the all too familiar fetal position that hundreds of me had taken at Hope’s feet.

“Got you!” Another shouted, seizing Hope in a bear hug, “you crazy wench!”

“Hold her still!” One of the larger assassins shouted, approaching her cautiously with a smaller man, “We got her!”

“You boys forgetting something?” Hope asked, sitting back on the man holding her, setting her weight on his legs.

Just as the other two were in reach, she slammed a boot into the bigger guy’s balls. He whimpered and crumpled to the ground. The smaller man’s eyes widened and he halted his advance, fearing for his balls. But he had attacked Hope in the night, none of the boys were safe.

She brought her head forward and slammed it back, cracking her captor on the nose.

“FUCK-“ The assassin screamed, letting go and clutching his face.

“Wide open!” Hope shouted turning, and grabbing his shoulders. Her knee screamed in the night, crashing into the assassins balls. He squealed, falling face first into her bountiful bosom. His screams were muffled by her chest.

Hope held his face in her chest as she shot knee after knee into his balls. He screamed and jumped each time, tears soaked into her boobs.

“One more!” Hope shouted, shoving the assassin back. He stumbled into a square stance and she once more sent her boot into a man’s balls. He screamed and crumpled to the ground, gargling on vomit and man-tears.

Hope turned to see the smaller man, frozen in place. His legs were shaking.

“Afraid for your ballsies, Mr. Assassin?” Hope asked, sauntering towards him.

“Stay back!” The assassin exclaimed pulling out a dagger. “Don’t get any closer!”

“You know this is the fifth time you guys have come after me,” Hope said, not breaking her stride, “surely by now you’ve learned I’m going to bust your balls. Do you not have any girls on your side?”

“Aaaaaah!” The assassin cried out, thrusting his blade forward.

Hope sidestepped, grabbing his arm and yanking as hard as she could, he stumbled forward, his fear weakening his stance, and, from behind, Hope snapped a kick right between his legs. He coughed and dropped his dagger, smacking his knees together. Hope walked around infront of him.

Just like all the boys tonight, just like all the assassins for the last week, his eyes were crossed and his face was twisted in pain. He wasn’t as cute as that Hero she busted a while ago, but the look of pain was still adorable. Boys always tried to hard to be tough, and a little kick in the balls shattered their entire world.

“How do your balls feel?” Hope teased, winking. The assassins face was red with pain as he held back a scream. Hope blew a kiss and set her hand on his chest, pushing lightly. He fell over and started sobbing in the ground.

“That settles that-“ Hope began, a shift out the corner of her eye interrupted her. Just in the Knick of time, she ducked away from the thrust of a blade. One of the assassins she busted earlier still had some fight in him.

A menacing flash twinkled in Hopes eyes, this boy thought he was tough.

She instantly closed the distance between them, pressing her boobs against his chest. She swung her hand back and then slammed it directly into her assassins balls.

“HURGH!” The assassin squealed, his blade feel from his hand and he leaned onto her shoulder.

“I got your little ballsies in my hand,” Hope said, securing a fast hold on the assassins nuts, “you want to keep them?”

The assassins face jerked his head up and down, his entire being held in the palm of Hopes hand.

“Don’t worry, I won’t pop them,” Hope said, “if you can whistle.”

“If,” The assassin coughed, “if WHAT?”

“Whistle,” Hope said simply, “whistle for me or I crush your balls.”

She started squeezing on her last word, the assassin squealed and immediately tried to whistle. But he couldn’t, his balls were being crushed by a bratty girls hand. He couldn’t even get the air to blow out.

“Oh that’s not good enough,” Hope shook her head, as the assassin continued to blow and squirm, “sorry, Mr. Assassin. Say goodbye to your balls.”

With fluid motion, she let go of the assassins balls and shoved him back. As he squared up, he began to crumble to the ground. But before the ground could accept him, and as he fell, Hope took one step back. And then launched her booted foot straight into the assassins poor balls.

“MYYYYYYYYYYY BALLLLLLLLLLS!” The assassin screamed, crashing to the ground.

“I don’t know if they’re balls anymore,” Hope smirked.

She surveyed her camp. Ten of the biggest, baddest man were all wailing and crying for their busted balls. The first night it was easy, but Hope had to admit. She was getting tired of breaking so many boys.

“Gods,” Hope grunted, examining the amulet resting between her breasts, while all of the assassins continued to sob for their balls, “maybe Mr. Hero was right. Busting so many balls is wearing me out.”

*Three days later*

I can’t tell you how many men I found in her wake. Town after town, forest after forest, just dozens and dozens of men cradling their balls. Hope was demolishing some of the most dangerous, well trained men out there. And I knew how.

I was keeping my distance, I didn’t want her to make good on her threat. And she happened to be moving in the direction of the Dark Lord anyway, so it worked out. But my luck ran out. As I waded through the dark forest, I stumbled into her campsite. And I wasn’t the first.

I counted seven men, all of them on the ground and holding their balls. Some with their trousers pulled to their ankles, some slumped against a tree, all of them beaten and busted by a girl half their size. And that girl was now standing on top of one of them, her boot buried into his balls.

“Say Mommy!”

“MOMMY!” The assassin screamed.

“Good boy,” Hope laughed, twisting her boot and squishing his balls. The assassins screams were cut off and he collapsed to the ground.

“Phew,” Hope said, wiping her brow, “you boys are starting to work me ou-“

She stopped once she looked up and saw me, my eyes widened and I instantly dropped my supplies.

“You!” Hope shouted, stomping towards me, I turned to flee but her hands were on my shoulders. I already knew what was coming next. I braced myself.

“Take this back!” Hope shouted, ripping the amulet off her neck, and slamming it into my chest. I stared at her dumbfounded.

“What?”

“I said take it back!” Hope exclaimed, “it’s way more trouble than it’s worth. I’ve had a hundred assassins chasing me for it.”

“Why not just give it up?” I asked.

“I’m not a fucking monster!” Hope shouted, “The Dark Lord is evil! You think I’m just going to give him the one thing that makes him weak!”

“Then-“ I stuttered, “THEN WHY TAKE IT?”

“You insulted me,” Hope snapped, crossing her arms. The pose pressed her boobs together, drawing my eyes to them, “you said girls couldn’t fight. I wanted to bust your balls.”

“But why take the amulet?”

“I thought it was funny!” Hope shouted, “And you were being so cute about it ‘no, please, don’t take the amulet! My balls!’”

“That’s… that’s a terrible impression,” I muttered.

“But now it’s not funny,” Hope continued, kicking the unconscious assassin, “I haven’t had a good night sleep in weeks, and that’s cause these morons keep attacking me. And I’m getting tired.”

She scooped up her supplies, strapping them to her back. I stared open mouthed at her. Any of these fights were life or death for a man, but for her it was just a nuisance.

“Good luck, Mr. Hero,” Hope waved, walking away, “if you live, come find me and I’ll give you a congratulatory Titfuck.”

“Why not now?” I asked, Hope stopped in her tracks.

“Excuse me?”

“Join me,” I said, Hope immediately scoffed, “no, listen! You’re a warrior, I can admit that. Just help me get to the Dark Lord and together we can beat him.”

“He’s supposed to be the strongest around,” Hope replied, “I’m not trying to die.”

“But we have the amulet! His magic won’t work on us.”

“No,” Hope shook her head, “sorry, Mr. Hero, I’m not like you. I’m not here to fight for good or anything.”

“But-“ I struggled, I wanted her to stay. I needed her to stay. She was incredible and… what if I could get that again? What if she would give me *that* again? Then it clicked. I just needed to speak her language.

“He has treasure,” I said, Hope’s emerald eyes perked at the word, “lots of it. And there’s a reward too. From the king.”

Hopes eyes narrowed, as she stepped closed to me. Her breath hot on my chest as she looked up at me.

“I get first pick?”

“You can have all of it,” I said, “I’m not in it for the treasure.”

“Ha!” Hope laughed, “You’re a crazy fella, Mr. Hero. Alright, I’ll join you.”

“Yes!” I shouted, clapping my hands, falling silent. I looked her sheepishly in the eyes, “And uh… can we…. Do that thing again?”

“Been thinking about the girls huh?” Hope smirked, “I’ve been thinking about that snake in your trousers.”

My face turned beet red and I squirmed in my feet. Hope turned around walking away from the entire campsite. I stayed still, watching her hips sway back and forth.

“Well, hurry up Mr. Hero,” Hope called back, “we have to make camp if I’m gonna Titfuck you before bedtime.”

I had never ran so fast.

*Hope the Rogue joins the Hero’s quest! Can they defeat the Dark Lord? Who else will they meet on their quest? Find out on the next Missadventures of The Hero!*